And somethings telling me it might be you all of my life..

PLEASE READ THESE TERMS:

[#o1] Welcome to my blog
[#o2] Do not rip anything off
[#o3] Live like you will die tomorrow
[#o4] Love like you have never been hurt before
[#o5] Follow your heart
[#o6] And remember to live life to the fullest
[#o7] Always be happy
[#o8] Follow all of the above cause Sandra says so

It Might Be You - Stephen Bishop

I am Cassandra Teresa Dias,

Another turning point - a fork stuck in the road
Time grabs you by the wrist - directs you where to go
So make the best of this test and don't ask why
It's not a question but a lesson learned in time
So take the photographs and still frames in your mind
Hang it on a shelf in good health and good time
Tattoos of memories and dead skin on trial
For what it's worth it was worth all the while
It's something unpredictable but in the end is right
I hope you had the time of your life
When our time is up,
when our lives are done,
will we say we've had our fun?
will we make a mark this time?
will we always say we tried?
all the love i have made,
i have no regrets,
it it all ends now,
i'm set...

I have no regrets

:D

myspace/hi5/friendster/msn
at askme@hotmail.com

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Thursday, November 30, 2006

12:45 AM

Smile Like You Mean It....

Yup..so i finally bought a new mp3 player,creative zen neeon 2...kana scolded by Michelle again..she say my face very long,never smile...then i was thinking really meh? I can't be bothered seriously...smile or don't smile..life is still the same...i feel so sian,so demotivated..and so stressed..i feel so stress to work whenever she is there..but i still chiong for sales target..i find smiling so hard..i find it so hard to smile when there's nothing to make me smile...I feel so shitty..i thought money will make me work harder..or make me more motivated but i feel depressed still...why? my friends are too hopeless,parents too busy,money's spent...world's black...everything seem so black..well,welcome to the black parade then!!! I'm broke again,serve me right..I'm sad again,also serve me right,everything serve me right...I feel so so so fucked up and pissed.wondering whether will i ever have enough time to do what i want to do..but never mind..today after work,me and hidaya went to PS to buy mp3 player cause she said she wanted one..after that,she treat me to long john silver..guess that gave me a reason to smile..Smile an everlasting smile,a smile that will bring you back to me=(

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Monday, November 27, 2006

11:09 PM

Kill Me!!!

Hais..today was off day..what did i do? nothing just deciding what to do with my money tomorrow.yay,its finally pay day..it has been a month since i have started working,wow, one month certainly pass very fast..so should i buy creative zen neeon 2? i don't know man...got so many things to do yet don't feel like doing anything...met up with xiu wen at the park today..chatted for a while but better than nothing..i feel so so so irritated but i don't know why.there's nothing much to blog about but i'm just blogging for the sake of it..yay,at least tomorrow got work but i don't want to mop the floor again..life's a bore without??? without you? i dont know..who the hell is the you..i just feel so bored...Someone kill me please?? I'm not depressed tonight,i'm just mentally unstable cause the whole story is i'm mad=)

2:00 AM

Full Of Shit...

Its so late now and i can't seem to sleep..you know i dreamt i went crazy yesterday..i have been having that dream for many nights already,i dreamt i broke down...i hope i don't..pay day is like one day away..i said i wanted to do many things with the money but now i don't feel like spending it at all..i feel so bored..the whole world is sleeping..i'm off tomorrow.and i deicded to spend it alone cause the whole world is busy...busy with what? they are not even working la for god's sake...anyway..since they have no time for me..i will be a good soul and not bother them..what kind of friends i have right? in name,we are called friends but i don't even feel that we act like friends...ya ya ya,i'm repeating myself over and over agan,i feel so old cause maybe i am old...do you know after so long,nobody had ever had the time to organise a gathering cause they are so called "busy"I so dislike people like them,so selfish...u know what,a few days ago somebody scolded me selfish..ya lor,i very selfish,you not selfish lor...i don't give a fuck already..you selfish doesnt mean i cannot be selfish wat? all humans are selfish what,only care for their own interest..i depise them..so i will rather be happy alone at least i won't feel disappointed..execuse after execuse,reasons after reasons..when will it ever stop? i feel so tired..i want a holiday..I'm not trying to be emotional here but enough is enough..i fuck care the world!!! I think i'm complaining cause i'm too sleepy but didnt i say i can't sleep?? I'm weird i know,i'm crazy,i also know..but i don't give a fuck what you people gonna say already..for god sake, whatever i do from now on,whatever shit you are organising,leave me all out..i rather spend my holidays all alone..cause all of you are unreliable!!! ok,i'm tired now..goodbye world!!

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Friday, November 24, 2006

12:34 AM

Break It Off....

My legs and arms are aching...i had to mop and vacum the damn floors today la...and the best part is you know that Cassandra Dias doesn't do housework right?ya lor..sianz la..tomorrow still have to work until closing..hope Jason will do it all for me=)haha..work was great...sales was good..but it was full shift today and i wonder how come time can pass so fast still..the faster,the better cause my salary will be next tuesday,yay!! cannot wait baby=) i cannot wait to get down to real shopping..i promise even if no one wants to go shopping with me or carry my bags for me,i will go alone,haha....nothing much to say leh...My tears don't fall.they crash around me=)

My Top 10 shopping spots:
1.Vivo City
2.Tampiness Mall
3.Pennisula Plaza
4.Queenstown shopping centre
5.Parkway
6.Bugis

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Tuesday, November 21, 2006

11:12 PM

Why can't I just hit the restart button and start everything again!!!

Today,woke up early feeling better than yesterday and i knew today will be great cause i'll be going sentosa to celebrate Jasmine Lim's birthday...she and i don't really know each other well but we are chit chat partners afterall=) met up with Stephanie and Hwee bing first then Jessie and Jasmine in the bus and later Hui Yu in Heartland to collect the cake as well...In the beginning,i thought i felt weird cause you know me...i have never gone out with them before and so i thought it would be akward but it wasn't..they are simple yet nice people...thats why simplicity is the best...why pursue so much for what? in the end,when we die..we also don't bring them to our coffin right or not?haha..ok..so we went Siloso..opened our picnic mat for a while under the wonderful coconut tree but it was still hot but we didnt care much..all cameras were up as you know we are from the Photography Club!!!haha...Jasmine blew her beautiful green tea cake..tell you something very funny..the cake not only green tea even our drinks were also green tea...after all it is jasmine green tea..haha..but green tea is nice ok? after that, we chat awhile and then played volleyball..now i really regret not taking PE seriously cause we couldnt even serve for god sake..it took us a few minutes before we could play a proper game..after a few minutes...we were told to scram cause someone has booked this court and so it was magic show time...who else could the magician be but Stephanie? we sat in circle and watch her magic trick..we are just so funny..we all know that its a trick after all yet we all laugh just to be entertained by her..haha...she's always my clown=) after that, i deicided to go to the bar across to get a drink cause it was so hot..steff and i went alone then we sat and chill for a while there...seeing the pool table there made us so tempted to play...so we decided to call jessie along and so she came and i deicded not to play..then later Jasmine came and she also played leaving Hwee Bing and Hui Yu there alone..and as for me? i was listening to the music there and drinking my so called drink which is afterall water only,haha but thats what i call living life and enjoying!! then later Hui Yu came and Hwee bing was alone...and so we all decided to bring our bags all over there..the bartender was so nice..her name is Jen..she's from the philippines..how i know ah? cause i talk to her lor..haha..then while the gang was playing,me and hui yu went to the beach to play water...so fun...she started throwing stones,so funny la she and she saw a sea shell which was alive and she started talking to it..funny right?haha..then i decided to take a tram one big round again cause they were all playing..so steff,jessie,me and hui yu took back to the beach station and bought drinks and food from the 7 eleven there then we came back again but sadly they heven finish their game....then later i just sat down and enjoy the beautiful scenery lor until time to go home...then went thai express with Jessie for dinner..oh sad...i have work again tomorrow...why does fun always have to end so fast?

11:09 PM

We,the photography club girls promise to take nothing but the best pictures to prove to you that photographs captured beats nothing but life's greatest memories..."My life is a film.so play me nothing but my life's most greatest memories"quoted by Cassandra Dias.

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Monday, November 20, 2006

11:06 PM

"Give Me Novacaine"

Take away the sensation inside
Bitter sweet migraine in my head
Its like a throbbing tooth ache of the mind
I can't take this feeling anymore
Drain the pressure from the swelling,
The sensation's overwhelming,
Give me a long kiss goodnight
and everything will be alright
Tell me that I won't feel a thing
So give me Novacaine
Out of body and out of mind
Kiss the demons out of my dreams
I get the funny feeling, that’s alright
Jimmy says it's better than here,
I’ll tell you why
Drain the pressure from the swelling,
The sensation's overwhelming,
Give me a long kiss goodnight and
everything will be alright
Tell me that I won't feel a thing,
So give me NovacaineOh Novacaine
Drain the pressure from the swelling,
The sensation's overwhelming
Give me a long kiss goodnight and
everything will be alright
Tell me Jimmy I won't feel a thing,
So give me Novacaine......

10:24 PM

Drenched In My Pain Again.....

I'm stoning..been stoning since the time i woke up...i don't know why..i'm just staring into empty space..i feel so blur...so dreamy..no wonder in class they also say i day dream and now i really believe it too..met up with steff today...then went work...had a new staff called Karen and kay is gone..so sad!! after all, we were once colleagues..i remember he was the one who helped me on my first day of work..ya..parting is part and parcel of life...its true..anyway..i felt very sick today...physical and mentally..i feel so bored.so sad, so weak..i don't know..i feel like i'm dying...dying for time to pass by quicker...dying to have fun..i'm so frustrated and the best part is i don't know why..am i a perfectionist? a freak who thinks that life is a bed of roses everyday? or a fool who thinks that she can get whatever she wants easily? i don't know what's my fucking problem but i know i have a problem..i can feel it.menses? possible maybe....hais...been sighing the whole night...i seem to lose all my zeal in life...Cassandra Dias seem to be now dead..i want to sleep but i can't sleep..keep tossing and turning..lyrics keep appearing in my damn head and i start singing them out loud....memories and flashbacks keep coming...i feel so tired...even Michelle scolded me again today..she keep saying i'm in a daze but the best part is i don't realise it..she say i'm in my own world..ya..i admit i am....at least,my world does not have the word misery...i'm feeling crazy lately...there's nothiing to be depressed over but i'm feeling depressed..i just don't know why...why am i so useless? everything also don't know...what the hell do i know then? i feel like screaming but the thought of me screaming alone makes me wanna scream even louder...i can't smile...will you make me smile again like you always did? sobx sobx sobx...i'm so bored...i'm going out tomorrow and its suppose to be a good thing but why do i feel like i'm being forced to go out? i feel like shit..i really feel it..i don't know how to explain that feeling but i know its killing me...my head's spinning..I wonder if the world wasn't round,will i be much happier?haha..sorry but it was just a thought that pass thru my head...i heven done my homework for god's sake..heven do so much things...i'm worrying worrying....is anyone listening to me? i wanna run away...i wanna scream...i'm on the edge of breaking down and there's no one to save me...i'm sick of being sad.I don't think i'm ok...here comes the rain again,falling from the stars,drenched in my pain again becoming who we are.....

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Saturday, November 18, 2006

10:05 PM

Hatred And Misery Kill Us All.....

Yup..just finish eating my steamboat...you must be thinking why i sound so sian,even Rosanne felt it..yes..i am sian, very sian!! I feel so sick.i puked out all my steamboat stuff..the world is so unfair,just received a phone call from Noor just now,she ask me to work full shift tomorrow and obviously i told her no!! for god's sake" i wanna take off tomorrow also cause my stomach is churning,throat's suffocating.." but i never told her anything..i just said no..will she believe me if i told her that i was sick also? i don't know...what is right? what is wrong? who should i believe? i'm confused...i feel physically sick and mentally drain...my whole life now only revolve around my job...today when Rosanna and my gang asked me when i could go out with them..i was speechless..i mean i'm crying out for god's sake..all i gave them was a " i don't know" i feel so so tired suddenly..money is my motivation...but there are other things i want too..time? i need time...yet i need money..are humans always that greedy? didn't i thought i learn the art of contentment? i guess i didnt after so long...my head's spinning...brain's not thinking...or should i say it has never stopped thinking?? i don't know..i'm sick and the whole world's like asking me to sleep but i can't sleep....do i sound unhappy? do i sound sick? will you tell me please cause i really don't know...guess the people around me is not only busy..i was wrong..the one who's real busy is me..me me me...everything slapped on me..i feel like a sinner..because of money..i missed church this weekend..i feel so guilty..oh..then today Huiling delivered food to me..and then she left..i was thinking yes its the thought that counts..but all i wanted was to spend some time with her..she agreed initially though she didnt promise me anything then later she said she could not... but she left me hanging...why do people always back out and tell me sorry..to tell you the truth..the word i hate to hear is the word sorry...since you know it will hurt a person then why still do it?..guess it doesn't matter anymore cause i'm so used to people repeatedly telling me sorry...i realise i can't seem to give people answers nowadays...i know i'm not an angel also..but i tried my best in pleasing everyone...can't you see? if only i could puke out all my unhappiness also..but i can't..no one seems to be listening..everyone seems to be dead or should i say i'm the one who's dead? i don't know, i really don't know....Ya..sandra is unhappy but does anyone care? the answer is a straight no to my face...sad right? i keep questioning myself whether i should be a loner or i guess being anti-social is better for me..i'm scared of being alone yet scared of being too close to people cause they always disappoint me..I promise that I'm not fucking okay today..do you even care? guess no one knows i'm bleeding inside...no one gives a fuck!!

9:06 AM

If only you know that i don't wanna speak these words, cause i don't wanna make things any worse...

we drive tonight,
and you are by my side.
We're talking about our lives,
like we've known each other forever.
the time flies by,
with the sound of your voice.
its close to paradise,
with the end surely near.
and if i could only stop the car
and hold onto you,
and never let go (and never let go)i'll never let go (i'll never let go)
as we round the corner
to your house
you turned to me and said,"i'll be going through withdrawal of you for this one night we have spent."
and, i want to speak these words
but i guess i'll just bite my tongue,
and accept "someday, somehow"as the words that we'll hang from.
and i (i..), i don't want to speak these words.
'cause i ('cause i..), i don't want to make things any worse.
and i (i..), i don't want to speak these words. 'cause i,
i don't want to make things any worse.
why does tonight, have to end?
why don't we hit restart,
and pause it at our favorite parts.
we'll skip the goodbyes.
if i had it my way,
i'd turn the car around and runaway,
just you and i.and i (i..),
i don't want to speak these words.'cause i ('cause i..),
i don't want to make things any worse. (any worse)and i (i..),
i don't want to speak these words
'cause i, i don't want to make things
and i, i don't want to make things any worse

1:00 AM

I don't wanna speak these words....

so long never blog already..i'm feeling so god damn sick,i mean physically sick..i went to relieve lot 1 today and it was so blardee far,it starts at 9am and i was late la...cause blur me took the wrong train..i took the wrong side..haha..sit until backside pain but luckily got my mp3 to accompany me..my mp3 is better than any of my friends at leasts its there when i need it..ok,going out of point already..hais,i'm having menses now la and just now met up with Jasmine and Jessie..they told me they called me like shit and together with stephanie they wanted to report to the police..so sweet of them right? haha,fairli even lied to me saying my house was on fire cause she couldn't get me too..guess i should try offing my fone again,haha...my head really hurts and i feel liking puking..just now i almost pass out luckily for jessie and jasmine..otherwise,i will be sent to the hospital..we took a cab and i puked inside it but luckily got plastic bag,haha..this jessie so nice,sent me to my doorstep..thanks alot=) So what have i been up to these few days that pass me by..i witness a man rolling off the escalator at bishan mrt while waiting for my train..so poor thing right? hais..then work was good..then something weird happen after work..i was waiting for ee wen to finish work then while drinking alone..an old woman asked if she could with me and of cause i said yes..then she started talking to me,she said she was a catholic and her's husband's a eurasian also..then i was like" what a coincidence!!"haha..then later she talked to the man beside her and soon later three of us were talking happily..then a malay man siting near me asked if we were a family..then obviously i say no..then the malay man talked with us also then his good friend came and joined our conversation..the first man left and soon we were talking about ghosts cause the grandmother asked if bishan mrt was haunted cause they were people walking in the bishan mrt..haha..then we talk and talk and i was laughing cause i don't even know them but it was fun...i wonder whether working in Giordano has made me more crazy and i believe it opened up my horizons,haha..i feel so sick now la,feel like puking..some one make me well again please!!! yay!! tomorrow having steamboat,cannot wait but hope i can eat cause i think i'm suffering from gastric flu..hais..again sick!! but its good to be sick at least someone delivers porridge to me...haha..i cannot wait for x'mas..i seriously can't..the first thing i'm excited about is my damn pay...yay!!! some sicko added me online and talked to me,he was a sick bastard..anyway,i'm not a loose woman....hais..sunday still have to work but how to? i'm so sick,i wish i faint halfway,haha..I was just wondering whether i can quit my job right now...i need money badly but hais....i don't wanna speak these words cause i don't wanna make things any worse...

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Monday, November 13, 2006

8:30 PM

Rainy Days

Talkin' to myself and feelin' old
Sometimes I'd like to quit
Nothing ever seems to fit
Hangin' around
Nothing to do but frown
Rainy Days and Mondays always get me down.
What I've got they used to call the blues
Nothin' is really wrong
Feelin' like I don't belong
Walkin' around
Some kind of lonely clown
Rainy Days and Mondays always get me down.
Funny but it seems I always wind up here with you
Nice to know somebody loves me
Funny but it seems that it's the only thing to do
Run and find the one who loves me.
What I feel has come and gone before
No need to talk it out
We know what it's all about
Hangin' around
Nothing to do but frown
Rainy Days and Mondays always get me down.

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Sunday, November 12, 2006

11:29 PM

I think the chain broke away...

I'm off tomorrow..sad man!! i rather work than stay at home...ok,you know what? the holidays are here and the most fucked up shit is that people are more busier than usual..tell me why? Are they just so kiasu to study at home? they rather stay at home watch tv than to go out? i just don't know why its just so hard getting a person out...don't keep telling me sorry,i mean no one owes me a living but let me make this clear also, i don't owe anyone a living also ok?? Don't expect me to agree to anything the next time anyone ask me out..you know why? cause i've been too fucking nice...i always hate turning people down yet you people always turn me down..ya,i'm selfish..but think about it..i work, i'm not like some rich ass who can afford to stay at home shake legs...i wish i could,i really wish i could..yes,i love being alone and guess i'm still alone..even though i have many people in my damn screwed up life, but i feel like they were never there..logic? reasons? execuses? ya,they are all part of people..what about feelings? was it never a part of human's game? i don't know why i'm kicking up a big fuss here,but all i know is that i'm tired..tired of bothering of using my damn rest day to spend time with you guys cause all i get is a sorry...Sorry?? its so easy to say yet so hard to be understood..selfish fuckers!!! don't understand why there are such people in my life...you know what? its better not to bother next time..its just a waste of my fucking time..i think the chain broke away,i felt it the day i had my own time...

10:10 AM

Things I wanna do when i get my first salary:
1.Pay off all my debts!!!
2.Treat people who have never stop loving me
3.Shopping time
4.Get my second tattoo
5.Buy X'mas presents
6.Eat till i choke
7.Learn drums....
8.Give my parents some money
9.Organise gatherings
10.Visit places of interest(sentosa,zoo)
11.Put money in the bank
Cassandra turns broke again=)

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Friday, November 10, 2006

10:54 PM

Hi!! Welcome to Giordano....
After working in Giordano for less than two weeks,i feel like I'm slowly falling in love with it..i mean not only crazy about their jeans,about the people there..now i fully believe that Giordano getting the good service award really lives up to its name..the people there are so nice especially my colleagues....perhaps,we have all changed from an unfriendly person to being a helpful and friendly person to work in this line...sometimes...working in this line is good..cause no matter when we are sad or happy,we still have to act happy and keep smiling to the customers...what a noble job don't you think it is? Anyway, we open shop late today cause Michelle woke up late...one hour late ok? No briefing today..but at least i had the feeling of opening its doors..so bloody heavy alright? haha..then went to the bank,not a single crowd..and so the samuel and kelvin guy was obviously not there la...haha..came back to the shop in less than 15 minutes and it was already filled with customers,michelle was like telling me" maybe next time we should open the shop later then more customers..then i was like ya..haha..so we opened shop around 11 plus and guess what..after 1-2 hours,she ask me to go for a break,i mean my break has always been 2 plus and now its 12.30 only...wheregt people go for break so early? but i had no choice..so went to all foodcourts but no place,then sick of BK,so last resort was to eat Macdonalds...ate mc spicy set meal,haha...after that went shop,still had 1/2 hour more before i sign in again..i was looking at the new arrivals and then michelle was like shouting to me" nice right? go try la" and so i happily tried..its so nice,it has sequins all over, tried the pink but it wasn't for me,then Hidaya ask me to try black and so i guess the black looked nicer on me...so gonna buy that top...haha..today gt a lot of customers,i admire their patience sia..they can try jeans after jeans but in the end,never buy a single pair..i mean don't they feel tired putting in and taking out..maybe they enjoy it..after all, i always advise my customers to try before buying in case they don't like it after trying or the size or colour is not for them...Most of my customers all complaint that their favourite tops are too small,say very hard to buy clothes,say they very fat,wear certain tops already will show their fats...got one customers, figure so nice,so dare to tell me say what," i think i wear this look very fat" so siao,you fat then i what? giant already la?hhaha..then out of nowhere..i saw lee xuan and her mum..chatted with them for a while only cause at that point of time, it was very crowded..but i appreciate you coming down to visit me xuan=) then serve serve serve until time for me to go home..oh ya,then jason came in..talk to him for a while..cannot stand it,he really reminds me of angela ok?,haha..then guess what, i finally got my Giordano coupons..jealous or not? haha..they give me 20 pieces, shiok hor? can shop for x'mas already,haha...Oh ya,forget to tell you..when we sign in and sign out,we have this high five traditon...so fun right? yeah!! i love working in Giordano!!! Next time,if you come and visit me,then you hear someone shouting" Hi welcome to Giordano!"so obvious,the person has to be none other than Cassandra Dias=)

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Thursday, November 09, 2006

11:29 PM

Step Up..all you need is a second chance!!!

Went to watch step up today....finally man..oh,today i off again...shiok right? must be wondering why i almost everyday like don't need to go work like that but don't go also go la...at least got time to go out..i today so kiasu sia..cause scared tickets sold out so i purposely go and buy early,hillary also scared but she had school so i had to go J8 alone first to buy them...Walked a fews rounds while waiting for her..guess what? fox got jacket promotion, instead of $29,now only $23...yay!! i wanna buy that jacket,so nice..you must be wondering i just bought a Giordano jacket recently, S'pore so hot, buy so many jackets for what right? but i just love wearing jacket..today i wore my jacket to j8..i know i was mad cause the sun was freaking hot..i believe there were some people staring at me thinking wah, weather so hot,still wear jacket, so siao!!..but why should i care..as long i happy can already right? so after,hillary finally arrived..went to foodcourt to eat cause i was so hungry..ate tom yam soup..after that went to catch step up at 2.10pm...she bought the taiwan chicken in and i was damn happy with ym seats...definitely the saying of early birds catch the worms first is right..i was sitting right at the back in the middle of the whole entire screen..shiok leh...we didnt bring in any popcorn or coke,so sad..then later some indian boys beside Hillary had popcorn..then i tell her say, ask them if can share popcorn la...haha,so funny la...but she didnt ask,she only said she scared her hand will suddenly stretch to eat their popcorn..haha..ok..the movie was nice la...especially the lead actor and actress...both dance so well..i won't tell you the whole story,you watch then ownself know...its just very unpredictable..talks about second chances..sometimes, we just need a second chance to know what we want..we have to fight for what we want..we have to always try living life being a better and better person fighting for what we really want instead of thinking that we are not worth it to get that something...so nice right? the lead actor was so hot,don't know what the hell is his name la,all i know is that they dance together..the lead actress dances ballet and he dances hip hop..who will thought two people dancing different dance will end up together? thats why i always say opposite attracts,haha..but i wouldn't expect them to be together cause the lead actress was rather hostile to the guy,as he did something wrong and was sent to her dance school to be the janitor and there was where they met..haha..life is really very funny...the more we don't expect it to happen,the more it will happen..but the movie was really good!!! Hillary and i was like discussing how hot the lead actor was but the movie really made me understand something and that is to fight for our own happiness..So,people!!! fight for your own happiness ok? Don't give up because you will never know when that chance will come again..Anyway..after that, went home,took a nap again then wake up eat katong laksa,my dad bought it..then Jasmine called me and we had a great chat,all the best for the upcoming papers ya?? after that, we can meet up,haha...cannot wait...even if bad things,or good things are going to come my way..i still cannot wait for it cause from this minute,i'm giving myself a second chance to fight for my own happiness=)

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Wednesday, November 08, 2006

10:54 PM

My Confessions!!
1.I miss the word called "time" cause it seem to be slipping off my fingers..
2.I miss going to the beach alone cause i just love reflecting...
3. I miss my gang, their laughter and smiles...
4.I miss my brother cause now there's no one to insult me=)
5. I definitely miss my mahjong sessions cause it needs 4 people to play
6.I miss going to school cause i have not worn the uniform for some time
7.I miss my tears..cause now there's nothing happy or sad to make me cry
8.I miss family gatherings cause we can boggie all night
9.I miss the thought of going for a jog cause i'm putting on weight
10. I miss Stephanie,she never fail to make me smile
11. I miss Jessie cause i can't wait to listen to her great Korea trip stories
12.I miss my phone ringing,cause now everyone seems so busy
13.I miss the feeling of being with a friend cause now i have choosen money over time
14.I miss the feeling of being disturbed,cause its not a burden to be needed sometimes
15.I miss downloading songs using morpheus cause I'm scared the police might catch me
16.I miss being a kid cause now i'm not a kid anymore
17.I miss fighting with Huiling cause now we are just too nice
18.I miss looking at my clock cause it seems like i don't even have time to look at it
19.I miss being myself cause i seem to have lost myself
20.I miss dreaming at night cause now i have been day dreaming
21.I miss my camera cause now i can only take picture of myself and no one else
22.I miss being drunk cause i will rather not be sober
23.I miss God cause everynight i forget to pray
24.I miss everyone in my life cause they are what makes my life meaningful
25.I miss Green day cause now i don't even have time to listen to music
26.I miss these 25 things cause there are things listed that i miss

What i have been missing are things i have been taking granted all this time..

8:28 PM

When You Gonna Give It Up To Me??
Today went work again..saw calvin in the mrt, everytime see him sia...newae,went to the bank and saw calvin again, but never see the cute samuel and kelvin guy..so sad and disappointed,haha...today was alrite at work, clinched quite a few expensive deals but so sad the comission don't go to me,haha..wa lao, this michelle scolded me la..she keep asking me not to sleep...damn scared of her la..lyk ah lian..but for an ah lian to be a in-charge is not bad already...i mean i admit i day dream..dreaming of what ah? dreaming of money la then what?haha..after work..it was Ee wen's break so we went lunch together...she also admit that michelle is fierce,haha..we ate burger king,i so love their chicken cheeseticks,it rocks...enjoyed chatting with her,she's nice...after lunch,she went back to work and i went to Baleno to visit Fairli,oh i forgot to tell you,she got the job,haha....after that called xiao bao up,decided to visit them at macdonalds...i don't know how to go to kovan from them so i ask the passenger service,she told me to go down to the mrt station and come out from the other side to take bus 153 ..i listened to her and you know what,i ended up in the same place..i don't why also,haha..i so blur right??haha..in the end,decided to take train to douby ghaut,haha...after that,reach mac,xiao bao,mojo and hilda were there...so hardworking sia they, i'm sure their hardwork will be rewarded=) Today,me,xiaobao and hilda did something to make mojo angry..this is the first time i ever see mojo getting angry,this was when we knew we were in the wrong..the best part was i was thinking of fishball noodles the whole time thruout, i'm so heartless right? xiaobao and hilda thinking of how to explain things to mojo and i was just thinking of food...saw si hui and wei wen there..chatted with them for a while..after that..three of us went to eat dinner..i was harping on fishball noodles and so i finally get to eat my fishball noodles..i feel so hypocritical..if you often read my entry,you will know that i won't eat fishballs from that day onwards cause i ate 8 fishballs that day and was sick of it..haha..people like me change so fast right?haha...after that,they send me to the bus stop..then i went home...yay!! gonna watch step up tomorrow!!! Hot Hot Hot....so, when you gonna give it up to me??

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Tuesday, November 07, 2006

11:13 PM

Obession With Red
Today don't have work so can wake up late but woke up then already received a sms from Stephanie, then went downstairs to pass her something,i seriously seriously miss her alot man..haha..then went to aunty bobo to dye my hair...went there around 10.40am..sat there for full 4hrs,sit until my backside pain sia...she so nice...people use one colour to highlight but she say she can give me another colour...first she dye my hair brown to cover my million white hair..then later hightlight my damn hair..all for 50 bucks..so nice of her!!i don't know why but i' obessed with the colour red,so i decided to highlight red..i tell you,my backside really hurts ok? after sitting there until 2.30pm..went home for lunch then Mojo came over..we had a movie appointment today,haha..but we didnt know where to go..she wanted to go j8 but i didnt want to as you know it is too boring for me..so we decided to head to suntec to watch movie at the same time to visit huiling...eh,is not my idea,its mojo ok?? i know you are reading..so what will happen if i become the boss?haha..your customers are so damn funny thats why i enjoy working in this line..i'm sure you did right?haha..must chiong for sales target tomorrow ok? i also will..yay!! tomorrow i working..i cannot wait..haha..oh.so in the end,mojo and me decided to watch deathnote though i watched it before...after that we went home..no..wrong,she came over to take back her maths worksheet,haha..so sorry i couldnt send you to the bustop..what a lousy friend i am right??haha..my mum saw my red hair and she said nice..but she say she will never go for red..she will only go for brown..brown?? boring la that colour, i need something fresh!! haha...i hope my boss won't scold me tomorrow sia!! I'M IN LOVE WITH A COLOUR CALLED RED=)

1:05 AM

My Skinny Jeans
Today,went for meeting at 9am..it was abit boring but in the end it became fun..michelle told us to try on a set of clothes we always wanted,so i tried my skinny jeans...oh ya,we have a new stuff called Jason today,he came from Bugis Junction,he reminds me of Angela,haha..so Kay,Hidaya,Jason and me came out with our set of clothes we choosed and she asked us to promote it infront of her..i so love skinny jeans,gonna get one when i get my salary,haha....after that,we opened shop..then went to the bank,1st saw Calvin,talked for a while,then guess what,i saw that cute Samuel and Kelvin guy again..ohh,he looks so terribly cute..when i came back,there was a new attachment student called Ee Wen for nayang poly...she asked if i was a malay? i mean no one ever told me that i looked like a malay before,haha...yay!! finally,i got company=) today not much customers, keep foldong,folding and folding...then went for break,received a miss call from Fairli,she happen to be in Toa Payoh also,then we met up for my break...she then went to baleno to check if they are currently hiring anyone and so lucky they are short of manpower!! haha...but i still prefer my Giordano to Baleno..giordano people are more friendly..Agree or not? Guys,next time,if you come visit me and we don't greet you,you can hamtam me ok?haha..today was a rather boring day..oh ya...and i'm very angry with the woman selling fried fishballs.. cause it was 5 for $2..the worst part is she gave me 9,haha..and so i ate 8 of them...i feel so damn sick now..yay,tomorrow i'm off to dying my hair...I hope i won't dream of fishballs tonight..and i won't be eating them for quite some time!!! I want my Giordano skinny jeans!!

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Sunday, November 05, 2006

10:23 PM

My Damn Thoughts...
1. Why can't i download music using morpheus?
2.Why time pass so fast
3. Why do i have to grow up
4.When am i going to die
5.Wonder when is the world gonna end
5.Wonder who came up with the art of hypocrispy
6.wonder why i'm always so paranoid
7.wonder am i always so depressed
8.Wonder when am i going to see God
9.Wonder whether everything will stay perfect like the way it is
10. Wonder why people just cannot get along with each other
11.Wonder why i'm always bored
12.Wonder why i can't order time to slow down
13.Wonder whether i can finish my holiday homework
14.Wonder whether i will pass N'levels
15.Wonder whether anyone else is gonna leave me this minute
16.Wonder when will i be beautiful
17.Wonder when i will be happy
18.Wonder why those memories are always in my head
19.Why can't i just turn back
20.Why can't i just do what i want to
21.When will i ever stop living for others
22.Wonder is anyone missing or thinking of me right now
23.Wonder does anyone loves me
24.Why can't all my ifs and wonders be what i ever want?

9:08 PM

Time Flies and I Wonder Why I Can't Die.....
Time flies,it has been a week since i have started work...So bored,tomorrow still have meeting at 9am, but luckily, tomorrow i'm on morning shift..so long never blog already...so long never watch my princess hours, so long never see you all already,so long never meet familiar faces...how i realise working has taken away most of my darling time...no time to go out with friends, no time to even have a simple meal with them...Time really waits for no man..So what have i been up to?? I was off on friday,so met up with Huiling to help her at her store,bought a few stuff from her to help her,luckily she give me discount..she also treat me,haha...after that,went to have dinner with Jessie as she was flying off to Korean that morning already..i wonder how much they are enjoying there? so lucky, i also want to go for a holiday even if its just for one day,haha...see,i finally learn the art of contentment..then yesterday,i went to Hidaya's house for hari raya..so sweet my colleaugue right? its not that i'm racist but i'm glad that i finally have malay friends,haha...multi racial ah?? Michelle and kay Ling also went...guess what,they both love to play mahjong also..michelle say one day come to my house to play,haha...my boss really smoked man,she even smoked in the lift sia..so havoc right she?? after that followed her to work,i was on 2-6pm shift...then after work,met up with my parents for dinner there..bought alot of stuff,bought a three quarter pants, a handbag....and finally my black skinny jeans...wore them to church today...today's sermon was about loving the people around us...sometimes its just so hard to love a person when you now you don't like that person..but i believe i tried, God,i'm sure you can see that right?? haha..after that went to Godma's house for lunch..then went home...Took an afternoon nap,then this Jasmine called me,so long she never call me already,hope you are doing well in your revision,she asked about my job cause she also want to work,then later Fairli also ask about it...how come like suddenly the whole world knows i'm working?? haha...Sometimes, i really wonder isit better to work or stay at home to chill??haha,but i really need money, i also need time..Like what Yun Ting mentioned on her nick, "time,i order you to slow down!" yes, time,i order you to slow down...but that is self deceiving...time waits for no man...i just hope i can make it for one month then i can take my salary,i have never work in my own life before...do you believe that a person like Cassandra Teresa Dias is working?? i just cannot believe it myself,to tell you the truth...its not that i look down on myself but its just you think,is Cassandra Dias up to it?haha...Hope tomorrow will be a good day=)

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Thursday, November 02, 2006

10:58 PM

World Without Strangers...
Today is the fourth day of my job in giordano..but i met two new people already,they are kay ling and dante...nice people..cool..nothing much today...just went to the bank again and saw that cute samuel and kelvin guy..always see him,haha...today got new stocks...guess what,i finally bought my giordano jacket and i'm bankrupt that i didnt eat my lunch..my colleauges heard it and asked me whether i wanted anything to eat..now i really know that i'm in a world without strangers...i feel crazy,cause in giordano,i'm so used to smiling to the customers that now when i'm out on my own,i also smile at people..so siao right?haha..but after working in giordano,cause i have to fold clothes every minute there,when i get home,i see any unfolded or messy clothes,i will ownself fold...what a habit right?? Guess what,i just ordered a black jeans worth $69 and i'm getting them at only $20, so nice right? they still ask me to try and say they reserve...guess working isn't so bad after all=)